things i’ve learned about teamwork from my husband--or--how to pull together when life seems crappy


when things are going well in your lives...

say to your special person with a big smile, “who lives better than we do?” and then give them a smooch. this is a big deal. it's fun, and you’ll be glad you did it when things are not going so well. speaking of which…

when things are not going so well in your lives and you’re starting to take it out on each other...

dig deep, call on your ancestors for help, and try your very level best in that really bad moment to reach out to your person. if you’re in a stand-off in the kitchen, go over and hug her. if you’re sitting in silent tension on the couch, put your hand on his knee. if you can summon it, say, “i love you.”

more than likely, this will both completely surprise and completely disarm your person. and more than likely, your person will be exceedingly grateful that you realized she was upset, too. and yes, more than likely, she will be just a little bit humbled because you were the one who was able to reach out.

if, on the other hand, when things are not going so well in your lives, you try your very level best to reach out to your person and you fail because you’re too far gone, trust that your person will reach out to you, and accept it when she does.

maybe in a few minutes, you’ll even be able to laugh about the way you threw a bag of cheetos and a shoe at the refrigerator and collapsed in a heap in the middle of the kitchen floor. or not. either way, it’ll be better than it was before.